The amount of times before a baby people said that having a baby would make you see things differently or that your priorities would change! I would think, maybe for you but not me! I will be exactly the same, there’s nothing in my life that would need to change, well I was wrong! Here is how my life has changed since having a baby…
I have always been religious but since moving to a new town when I was 18 haven’t really gone to church. Well since the baby was 12 days old I have been to church every Sunday. I think it’s a great environment and group of people for a baby to be around and that he deserves to be around the singing and worship the same way I was! I couldn’t really use the excuse that I can worship at home when I have a baby who wouldn’t sit to listen to my daily Bible study app!
I recently went back to university making my Diploma an Open Degree. When I was younger I got C and Ds and thought that that was the best I could do. However having a baby to make proud I went from these Grades to all As and have finnished university with a first!
I have always loved my family but since having Barney my love for my little neice has grown so much! I always loved her lots but I now understand how my sister carried her and gave birth to her and all the emotions she was feeling and it just makes for a totally different crazy lovely feeling whenever I see my neices beautiful little face.
We used to be an oven food family and not care at all! We would have burgers and escalopes with chips and not care we didn’t get our five a day! Now we have casseroles and cottage pie and other slow cooked vegetable filled dishes because our little boy is 6 months and starting to eat and we want the best for him!
In the past friends doing things to upset me would lead to arguments, falls outs and drama. Being attached to my little boy for 6 months now with no day off I just don’t have the time for it! Honestly my feeling is that they know I have chronic pain and a new baby and if it makes them happy they can choose to ignore me or ‘test me’ waiting for me to initiate conversations because I don’t want them to force themselves to see me or talk to me if that’s not something they enjoy doing!
When friends talk to me I will happily talk to them for hours and if I see something going on in their lives I will support them but I find it harder to start conversations through my sleep deprived state, which hopefully is understandable to them!
I have gone from having groups of friends… Daytime drinking friends, gossiping friends, night out friends, family friends. To just one group, a group of positive people who are going through their own things but have time for me and my baby within that. I’ve stopped with the gossiping and drinking in excess as although it was fun last year now I have a baby and know I need to set an example and be a better person!
Days out used to be drinking and spending too much money on food! Now we will go to our local pub spend about £20 on two meals and drinks and have a better time than any posh food market or drinking session! We go to children’s activity parks which are free for adults, basically we have more days out and spend less but have more fun! I also joined the national trust hoping that our baby can grow up and gain knowledge of all our historic buildings!
I used to spend all my disposable income on myself and clothes and alcohol for myself. Now it is completely different! I will spend £20 on an adorable item for little man but can’t warrant any spending on me! Luckily I have a good husband who recently bought me a new wardrobe for my new body shape but if he hadn’t I would have happily gone around in unflattering clothes so my little boy had above and beyond what he wanted!
In our free time, we used to see a few friends, I would usually see my mum once a week then sometimes see other people but we could go months just working and seeing each other. Now we have a baby who is a grandchild and nephew to lots of people we don’t have the same option to just keep to ourselves. We have to give him an opportunity to get closer to other people and as I am breastfeeding and attached to him it means sometimes I am tired and drained but still going out and about so that people can see the baby… Something I wouldn’t think I would do before he was born.
As a couple we have grown as we have had to make space for another little person. We have changed completely but for the better. We are more patient, we are tireder, we have less but stronger friendships, we have grown as people, our diets are improving and we even look different. It is such an adventure being a parent but even though we argue through our sleep deprived